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Cast
Dana Carvey
Pistachio Disguisey
Brent Spiner
Devlin Bowman
Jennifer Esposito
Jennifer Baker
Harold Gould
Grandfather Disguisey
James Brolin
Fabbrizio Disguisey
Austin Wolff
Barney Baker
Edie McClurg
Mother Disguisey
Maria Canals-Barrera
Sophia (as Maria Canals)
Robert Machray
Texas Man
Michael Bailey Smith
Henchman
Rachel Lederman
Texas Wife
Mark Devine
Trent
Kenan Thompson
Kenan
Jay Johnston
Rex
Jessica Simpson
Jessica Simpson
Jessica Lee Keller
Group Dancer
Vincent Riverside
Henchman
Mark Ginther
Henchman
Carrick O'Quinn
Henchman
Mitch Silpa
Henchman
Virginia Hawkins
Interview Woman
Jonathan Loughran
Security Guard
Ted Rooney
Security Guard
Brandon Molale
Doorman
Erick Avari
Cigar Maker
Phil Jones
Businessman
Michael DeLuise
Businessman
Larry Cedar
Businessman
Andrew Shaifer
Liberty Bell Security Guard
Vincent Castellanos
Art Dealer
Roger Mussenden
Waiter
Al Goto
Ninja Warrior
Simon Rhee
Ninja Warrior
Kevin Nealon
White Collar Executive
Bill Cho Lee
Mongolian Elder
Chao-Li Chi
Mongolian
Steve Gormley
German Businessman
Christel Smith
German Businesswoman
Ava Metz
Another German
Bo Derek
Herself
Barry Bernardi
Bernardo
Brian Catalano
Italian Officer
Gabriel Pimentel
Boxing Dummy
Martha Del Rio
Puerto Rican Housekeeper
Guelmarí Oppenheimer
Waitress
Tracy E. Wilson
Female Partygoer
Patricia De Leon
Waitress
Phil Fischer
Bully
Steven Hack
Chemistry Teacher
Dane Morris
Young Pistachio
Bryan Jeffrey Price
Jock
Andy Morrow
Captain America Kid
Naya Rivera
Captain America Kid
Julius Ritter
Captain America Kid
Brighton Hertford
Captain America Kid
Sandra Lindquist
Bartender
Eugene C. Palmer
Chef
Leland Crooke
Appraiser
Mike Johnson
Constitution Security Guard
Michael Lee Phillips Jr.
Constitution Security Guard
Buddy Bolton
Abe Lincoln
Stuart Quan
Ninja
Spencer Sano
Ninja
Hiro Koda
Ninja
Johnny Nguyen
Ninja
Yoshio Iizuka
Ninja
Ronn Surels
Ninja
Andy Cheng
Ninja
Steven Ho
Ninja
Tony Wilde
Doug
Berglind Icey
Big Bottom Girl
Leasi Andrews
Big Bottom Girl
Anna Marie Goddard
Big Bottom Girl
Theresa Madelin Lin
Big Bottom Girl
Adrian Armas
Group Dancer
Gustavo Vargas
Group Dancer
Paul Benshoof
Group Dancer
Oscar Orosco
Group Dancer
Andrea Bogart
Group Dancer
Paulette Maxwell
Group Dancer
Paula Abdul
Choreographer (uncredited)
Lisa Foiles
Lisa (uncredited)
Jesse V. Johnson
Thief (uncredited)
Shane Lyons
Shane (uncredited)
Michael Johnson
Himself
Cole Sprouse
Young Pistachio
Dylan Sprouse
Young Pistachio
Jesse Ventura
Self (uncredited)
Director
Perry Andelin Blake
Director
Nancy Karlin
Script Supervisor
Creator
Dana Carvey
Writer
Harris Goldberg
Writer
